Big Feelings

So I'm writing this at 10 pm in a bit of a depressed state. Maybe not the best headspace to start writing. Or maybe it's the perfect headspace to start writing. 

I tell my toddler all the time that big feelings are OK and that it's good to let out those big emotions in whatever safe way we can. They're almost three so safe is kind of relative right now. But we do the best we can. And the thing is, I wasn't brought up learning how to do this. I was brought up learning how to squash and shame my big feelings. So while I am telling my almost three year old, “Let out those big feelings! Roll around on the floor and scream! Yeah!” I'm also giving a little hug to my inner child who never heard those words but always needed to hear them. 

Now, of course, my issue is coping with delayed processing of said emotions which can often result in bouts of depression as my brain short circuits while trying to deal with said big emotions. So here I lay in bed at 10 pm trying to convince myself and my inner child that big feelings are OK; and that big feelings are always bigger at night. So with that, I'm (hopefully) off to sleep so I can dream big dreams and my brain can do its thing to process all the things I'm feeling right now. Here's hoping it's really crazy and I get a good story out of it. 

Till next time.